Being the Mother of a Teenager. Briefly and With Humour.
The mother of a teenager can determine the arc and depth of her child’s eye-roll from the movement of air on the back of her neck. The mother of a teenager repeats everything three times even under anaesthetic. The mother of a...
Passive Aggression. Where Does It Come From? What to Do?
Passive aggression is a type of behaviour expressed as indirect resistance to the actions or behaviour of other people. If we have no way of letting others know what we feel, we may do it differently: sulking, making barbed remarks, procrastinating, forgetting...
Why the Therapist Shifts the Focus from the Problem to the Therapist–Client Relationship
Why does a gestalt therapist often move the focus of attention away from the content of the problem and its details towards what is happening between therapist and client, asking questions instead: Clients (and we ourselves, when we are in the client’s...
The Meaning of Life Is Not a Goal but a Process
Most of us are used to living as if meaning had already been decided in advance. Picture yourself as a metro driver: a fixed route, predictable stops, and you know where your journey will end. No surprises, nothing unexpected — but is...
How to Ask for Support
People who find it hard to accept support struggle with two things: – admitting that they need support instead of denying it – asking for it Today we will talk about the second one. Support can be informational, emotional, financial, physical… What...
A Clinical Disorder or a Creative Adjustment?
How gestalt therapy looks at narcissistic, schizoid and borderline personality traits Imagine a child growing up in a world where you have to be either perfect, or feel nothing at all, or constantly balance on the edge of chaos in order to...
Expressing what cannot be said
It is known that heavy feelings can be relieved by putting them into words. Talking about what is painful can reduce the pain. But what if it is impossible not only to begin the conversation, but even to fully become aware of...
How do you meet love?
Why is it so hard to meet love? Many people suffer because they cannot meet their love. Well then, let me console you. There is no need to be sad — meeting your love is impossible anyway. Let us look into it....
How does codependency come into being?
The main difference between attachment in infants and in adults is that children, unlike adults, cannot choose those on whom they depend, usually cannot leave the caregiver, and do not have enough power to make these objects change their attitude towards them....
The person we love does not save us from anything
The person we love does not save us from anything, and they are not meant to. Many people look for a partner, trying in this way to solve their own problems. They naively believe that a love relationship will cure them of...