The person we love does not save us from anything, and they are not meant to.

Many people look for a partner, trying in this way to solve their own problems.

They naively believe that a love relationship will cure them of boredom, of longing, of the absence of meaning in life.

They hope that a partner will fill the emptiness of their life.

What a deceptive idea!

When we choose a partner while placing such hopes on them, in the end we cannot avoid hating the one who has failed to live up to our expectations.

And then?

Then we look for the next partner, and after them another, and then another and another…

Or we decide to spend the rest of our life alone, complaining about a cruel fate.

To avoid this, we should sort out our own life instead of waiting for someone else

to do it for us.

It is also advisable not to try to sort out someone else’s life, but to find a person with whom you could work on a shared project, spend time well, have fun, grow — rather than put your life in order or look for a cure for boredom.

The thought that love will save us, solve all our problems and grant us a state of happiness and confidence can only lead us into the captivity of illusions, and it cancels out the real transforming power of love.

And there is nothing more astonishing than to feel yourself being transformed beside the person you love.

Instead of seeking shelter in a relationship, it is worth allowing ourselves to awaken the part of us that has been dormant until now and that we have not let express itself: the ability to move forward with a clear sense of direction, and therefore to change and to grow.

For a union of loving people to flourish, it needs to be looked at from another angle — as a series of opportunities to widen one’s consciousness, to discover unfamiliar truths and to become a person in the full sense of the word.

Having become a fully grown adult who does not need another in order to survive, I will undoubtedly meet another person just like that, with whom I will share what I have, and she will share what she has.